Author Archives: sarannadewylde

About sarannadewylde

Writer of romance, erotica, urban fantasy, new adult and non fiction as Saranna DeWylde, Sara Lunsford and Sara Arden.

Dangerous Sex

Dangerous sex.

I don’t mean the kind without condoms. I mean the kind where you have to seek treatment and you have to explain to someone how exactly you managed to get your Labret caught on their Prince Albert, or why your bladder is buzzing.

Yes, I said your bladder. I used to work as a secretary for an emergency room and we had a patient come in complaining of abdominal pain. That’s a fairly common presentation and the ER doc and nurses went through a whole round of questioning with her about her activities, etc., if she had any idea what could be causing the pain. She claimed she didn’t. When her x-ray came back, they discovered a vibrator lodged all the way up into her bladder. Upon examination, it was still buzzing.

She’s not alone. My husband has torn that piece of skin under his tongue, broken his wrist…

I, myself, almost died because of a lingerie malfunction. Of course, I have this thing called a klutz gene and apparently that applies to all aspects of my life. Including sex. Or trying on lingerie.

I’d just purchased a new bra and panties set to model for my husband and I was trying it on, you know, making up a little striptease dance for when he got home from work and then I tripped over my own feet. Only, I was pulling my bra up on over my head because I couldn’t reach the clasps at the same time. The bra got hooked around my neck and one of the straps caught on the dresser. So I was hanging there, arms flailing like an T-Rex, but unable to get my footing or a grip on anything around me to pull myself up. I kept thinking, I can’t die this way. It’s too stupid… I was finally able to pull myself up, but the striptease didn’t happen when the husband got home. I had to explain to him why I had brahook-shaped bruises around my throat.

Then there was the guy I dated in the days before my husband who had a vibrator named Goliath and I’m pretty sure it ran on rocket fuel, but that is a post for another time.

But I maintain if you don’t have at least one injury from getting a little too crazy between the sheets, you’re not doing it right. So how about you? Any sex related injuries?

Categories: Uncategorized | Tags: , , | 4 Comments

Giant Giveaway and Sale

Wow, sorry this is so late. 🙂 Things have been crazy around my house and I’m on a deadline. So basically, there’s been a lot of crying and brain matter leaking out of my ear in an unsightly blob. 

But there’s treasure ahead, mates! 

Wanna win a paid registration and room to Authors After Dark and read some great books? I’ve thrown in with a fabulous group of authors who write some great steamy books to sponsor this giveaway. Details below!

Starting tomorrow you can get 6 offerings from 6 amazing authors for .99 cents! And whats better? Every book bought is an entry to the raffle to win one HELL of an Amazing prize!
An AUTHORS AFTER DARK PACKAGE! (including Registration and Room for 5 nights, parking if needed and some cool hotel goodies) and entry to a special “invitation only” party!

So what are the books you need to buy to get the Max (30)
entries for the books?

Entwined By Fate by S. A. Price http://www.amazon.com/Entwined-Fate-S-A-Price/dp/1607670771

The Blood and the Vow by Saranna DeWylde http://www.amazon.com/Blood-Order-Lazarus-Book-ebook/dp/B00AWJMPW0/

Lucas by Eliza Gayle http://www.amazon.com/paranormal-romance-shapeshifter-fantasy-ebook/dp/B004DL0N9U

Naughty Nibbles Anthology by Cara North http://www.amazon.com/Naughty-Nibbles-Erotic-Stories-ebook/dp/B00BA1EL5S

Sexy Shifters Box Set by Amanda Bonilla http://www.amazon.com/The-Sexy-Shifter-Shorts-ebook/dp/B00D8G5EWC

Jaguar’s Rule by TJ Michaels http://www.amazon.com/Jaguars-Rule-ebook/dp/B006RMR4WM

RULES: All book Receipts must be sent to everversestella@gmail.com With the Subject: AAD PACKAGE ENTRY (NAME OF BOOK). 

All books must be bought between June 17 and June 22

Now the fine Print: Winner pays their own transportation and
any gratuities, taxes and room service on the room. This prize cannot be
transferred and MUST be used for the 2013 convention year. This prize has NO
CASH VALUE and cannot be turned in for monetary compensation. In the event that
the winner cannot use the prize, the prize will be awarded to another name on
the list. 

GOOD LUCK AND HAPPY READING!

Categories: Uncategorized | Tags: , | 3 Comments

Claimed By the Alpha

I always knew I wanted to be a writer. I wrote my first story after watching The Exorcist at my 8th birthday party. It wasn’t very good. It was about a disabled girl who was possessed by a demon that lived in the woods. 

But I was always telling stories. When I was in middle school, my best friend and I still played with My Little Ponies. We made up stories for them and a lot of the time, they were gritty and kind of awful. The one that sticks out most in my memory is Porn Star Pony. She went to Hollywood to be an actress, but she couldn’t get a job. Waitressing was too much work for too little pay and she fell in with a bad crowd… 

I guess you could say I’ve always done bad things to my characters, too.

Like my newest coming soon from Nocturne Cravings called Claimed By the Alpha. The recipe calls for zombies, werewolves, a mad scientist, a hijacked luxury train, hot sex, and a woman who finds out the man she falls for isn’t a man at all, but a beast. Just like the one that killed her mother. But the only way to stop the spread of the infection is to face her biggest fear. 

I’ve had such a blast writing this one. Want a peek?

Excerpt:

“And you? You’re not a dangerous male?” The air around them changed as soon as she spoke—heavy.

He laughed—the sound rich and decadent. Its resonance sent shivers through her body and centered deep in her core where lust sparked and burned.

“Oh, malenkaya. I am.” His cold gaze was suddenly hot, raking over every inch of her as if she belonged to him. “The most dangerous in Aynkava.”

 She’d heard those lines before, males puffed up like blowfish on their own reputations. As if she were some mortal woman afraid of the crawling things in the dark and not a cop who’d been into the abyss and clawed her way out for her Guild badge. Yet, with Luka Stanislav, she believed every word from his granite carved mouth.

 Marijka knew part of it was the adrenaline, the rush of being alive when surrounded by death and the fear coursing through her veins as the coming pack signaled their descent onto the small village. Her analytical mind told her this was nothing but a chemical reaction, one she could overlook and put from her mind as soon as she parted company with the handsome Luka Stanislav.

But she didn’t want to put it from her head. What Marijka did want was a few hours of mindless pleasure, of touch. Some connection with another living being even if it was no deeper than a one-time fuck in the upstairs of a quaint country inn with honeyed vodka on her breath.

“If you’re so dangerous, wouldn’t I be better off on my own?” She cast a quick glance over her shoulder and knew there was something there—watching, waiting. Something hungry. Part of her wanted to run, but part of her wanted to stay too because leaving with him was a retreat.

“Perhaps. That is your choice to make.” He shrugged again as if it mattered little to him either way, but Marijka had watched his eyes flash from frigid indifference to languid heat. “Although I suggest whatever you choose, you do it quickly.”

“The inn,” she blurted before she could stop herself.

He held out her hand to her, his tanned fingers large and broad. “Then take my hand to mark your choice.”

To show those who were watching she was with him. Under his protection. Dear God, who was he that a pack of werewolves feared to attack him?

Marijka thrust her hand into his and he led her casually down the cobbled street as if the beasts slavering for their blood in the dark behind them meant nothing.

 

 

 

Categories: Uncategorized | Tags: , , | 3 Comments

%d bloggers like this: